It is so easy to pass judgment on one another. It is so easy to allow ourselves to fall into a habit of looking down on one another and keep one another pinned down. It is easy to allow ourselves to fall into a routine of “I can do this, so [name] should be able to do this as well.” These thoughts, though, are toxic.
There is a poster that circulates around on Facebook that has a statement on it, a quote that matters. “The only time you should be looking down at someone is if you’re trying to help them up.”
I know what some of you are thinking. “But a lot of people don’t want to be helped up.” True. But for every person that doesn’t want help, there are nine with their hands lifted up, begging for someone to notice and take their hand and help them to safety. Take suicide. Out of 10 people, for every ONE that doesn’t want help, there are NINE that could be helped if only we would give them some time.
It is NOT that hard to help someone. If you see someone in need, reach out there and help them. Don’t look at them and think “Well they should be able to help themselves, because I did.” Not everyone has the same tools. Not everyone knows which handhold to grab on the cliff of life and they’re slipping and falling toward oblivion.
Catch them. Maybe someone thinks that the world would be better off without them. “You know, I just wanted you to know I care about you and would really like to see some more of you.” Those words can be powerful in the ears of someone on the brink of disaster.
“You have a beautiful smile, what is it that’s causing you not to show it?” You may hear a lot of issues that to you would be easy to solve, but to the person you’re talking to are serious issues that they’re struggling with. Listen to them. Offer them advice from your own personal experience and give them the tools to succeed in their struggles.
“Hey [name], I haven’t seen or heard from you in a while. Was just wondering if everything is okay and if you need any time to get away and get some free time? What can I do to help you out so we can see some more of each other?” It’s a motivational statement. Hey, this person misses me and is giving me a way to have some time to devote to enjoying myself a little with this person. Maybe they can help me figure out a game plan to survive this storm I’m facing.
“You know, life isn’t so bad if you get the hang of it. Is there anything I can do to help you organize or plan out ways to help you with what you’re facing so you’re not so upset all the time?” You never know what needs are waiting to be met.
I get it. When you see someone complaining, the natural instinct is to roll your eyes and think to yourself, “here we go again” and a lot of times the end result of this natural instinct is to make a negative comment toward the person. But you can change your natural reaction. Maybe they’re just looking for attention… and maybe giving them that attention could save their life.
Display your positivity, and positivity will follow you.
If you change only one person’s life, it is an accomplishment that no trophy or award or amount of money can mimic. To have someone tell you, “I’m still hanging in there because of what you did for me, you really made a difference” is the most beautiful and rewarding feeling that life can provide.